A friend of mine endured some quite significant abuse as a child and, as an adult, much of that abuse was re-presented to her in nightmares. In her conscious life, she quite bravely worked through the trauma, bit by bit, by various techniques.
But the nightmares continued, occuring whenever they wanted.
My friend refused to be victimized a second time by these same events. She chose to see a veiled but therapeutic value to the nightmares. Although this attitude allowed her to see a continuity between her waking and dreaming therapy, it didn’t make her nightmares any less horrifying.
She needed comfort that was a little more tangible.
My friend decided to reward herself when she had one of “those” nightmares. She had limited means at the time so the reward wasn’t grand, but my friend would treat herself to a bagel and cream cheese at a deli on the way to work.
I lost touch with this friend years ago but I’m curious if she still has these nightmares and if she still rewards her bravery with a bagel in the morning.