(Male, 40’s) I didn’t believe a nightmare could be hilarious as well as terrifying — though I should admit that I was pretty scared while I was actually inside the dream. It’s only when I woke up and started thinking about it did any of it seem funny. But it is kind of funny, like a B-movie thriller.
I was one of four people performing an extremely large scale bank heist. Basically we were going to cause a natural disaster which would force a whole town to evacuate and then we’d rob a pre-selected set of banks and burn down everything else. Not a subtle plan but it gets points for audacity. The disaster we had planned involved flooding the city by draining a dammed reservoir. That part worked fine, sort of. The water left the reservoir and started flooding down the river toward the city. It must have taken quite a bit of time because the city was largely evacuated before the water got to it. But there was trouble back at the reservoir. When all the water disappeared, all that was left was all the wildlife that lived in the water — and an improbable collection of creatures was that: fish flapping for breath, thousands upon thousands of frogs, a good half dozen alligators … and an immense amphibious dinosaur. I believe it was a moasaur. We had just finished our work at the dam and each of the four of us were carrying a large satchel of hand grenades, gasoline “molotov cocktails” and C4 explosives. In the dream, though I don’t remember any of us carrying a lighter or a detonator or anything — these things were just supposed to go “boom” on their own free will or something. I saw the moasaur as it was eating two alligators. Yup, that was quite a sight! I tried to warn the others but one of the conspirators shrugged me off “Haven’t you ever seen an alligator before?” He tossed a hand grenade in the direction of the fuss and we all made our way toward the city. There was devastation everywhere, uprooted trees, overturned cars… somehow there were still people running away from the water even though the water had already torn through town. The ground was soggy, like after a rain but there were no pools of water. We ran across an open field behind some houses. I had the distinct feeling that the dinosaur was following us but then I looked around and saw that the situation was even worse. There were at least three of these same dinosaurs crawling out among the houses, casually eating stragglers. Again I tried to alert my conspirators and again they said “Stop daydreaming. Keep your mind on the task” while they casually tossed a couple firebombs over their shoulder. I think the plan was to burn down the city so the loss of the money wouldn’t be noticed. The next thing I knew one of the dinosaurs had grabbed one of the robbers in its mouth. He was shocked and surprised. That’s when Jodi Foster… did I mention that one of the robbers was Jodi Foster? It was really strange because throughout the dream I wanted to compliment her on her acting work but she was very serious and very focused on the robbery and I thought she’d just yell at me again. It seemed that Jodi Foster was the brains of the operation. The whole thing might have been her plan, too. She tossed a hand grenade at the moasaur that was now chewing on one of our companions and she told the rest of us to hurry. We’d made it to the outskirts of the city — why hadn’t we planned to have a vehicle, especially if we were going to be carrying loot? — but we were blocked off from it by an immensely tall chain link fence. The fence was easily three stories tall and it had barbed wire at the top. I took off climbing as soon as we got to it. I knew there were more than one dinosaur out there and I wanted to get as far away from them as possible. When I got to the top, I wrapped my leather jacket around the barbed wire and climbed over it. Climbing down was the hard part. I could see the dinosaurs massing in the field we’d just left. The other guy was refusing to climb the fence while Jodi Foster was sure taking her time. I knew I needed her if for no other reason than I didn’t know where we were supposed to go next. I mean she’s a great actress but it was getting down to every one for them self. She had gotten roughly half the way up the fence and I had gotten rough half the way down. I was yelling at her to hurry when the dinosaur attacked the guy on the ground. When I say attacked, I really mean more he just bit the guy in half. The dinosaurs were roughly the size of a garbage truck. I jumped the rest of the way down. There were dozens of people still running around, still trying to escape the flood that had already passed through town. Now they had something worse to worry about. I opened up my satchel of explosives and told people to take them, not that the bombs had shown themselves to be very effective against the monsters in the past. The dinosaur went for the fence and effortlessly toppled it down. There was nothing standing in the way between it and me. It was huge, black and green, sleek skin, squat like an extremely large and extremely angry frog, though its back legs weren’t that big. It had cold, unthinking eyes and breath that smelled like a damp basement. I was done for.