Doktor Leech and Elsa L. can’t wait to open their latest 3-D portrait from Theatre Bizarre 2016 made by the Great Fredini of Scan-a-rama fame. This unboxing episode includes another two-person full body scan as well as a 3-D bust of the couple. Join them as they get their first peek at the figurines, reminisce about their Theatre Bizarre adventures, and plan future poses. What color will next year’s figures be?
Is there anything quite as magical as fire? That smell, the flare of color, the flash of heat?
Fire, fire, everywhere at Theatre Bizarre, that wonderful annual masquerade at the Masonic Theatre, Detroit Michigan. The Doktor captured just a few of the fire performances that seemed to pop up wherever we turned.
My only disappointment from the 2015 Theatre Bizarre was that at this fete exhorting us to “Ride the Goat,” there was no appearance by the Baphomet statue so recently flaunted by the local Satanists. It’s probably for the best. I suspect pious devil-worship would have paled in comparison to the joyous revelries and raucous naughtiness that Theatre Bizarre is known for. You know the drill: Theatre Bizarre has come a long way from that notorious renegade party it once was and for some folks, there ain’t nothing quite as delicious as nostalgia for auld lang syne. For my money, Dunivant’s crazy circus has hit its stride in the Masonic Temple. Elsa and I were on-site for a good eight hours last night which means our ticket gave us great value for money.
Hold the goat, Theatre Bizarre 2015, for me, was really the Year of the Performer. I was able to look past the luridly lovely decorations and outrageous costumes long enough to pay attention to the remarkable calibre of the events occurring on the many stages. I know I mocked it a couple years ago when placards appeared at the venues listing the acts. I felt the glory was precisely in NOT knowing what would be seen. I repent and recant. I only wish I knew the names of more of the itinerant mimes, clowns and fireworkers. May they be recognized at least by descriptions of their work.
All Packed up and Ready to Fork: The show starts even outside Masonic, which is fortunate because the wait is sometimes lengthy. This year there were two entrances which minimized the time Elsa and I spent in the cold… but we were there long enough to catch a Theatre Bizarre regular, one of many performers whose name I don’t know. His routine is classic and well honed. This mime struggles with a suitcase that possesses a mind of its own, simple fare that requires great control and nuance because there is little flash to distract. More crowd-pleasing, perhaps, is his sword-swallowing but what he does when he combines a fork and his nose is priceless.
The evening heats up with fire dancing contortionists.
Quest for Fire: I was also fortunate to be in the right places to witness the work of a lithe blonde fire-dancer. She twirled a flame-tipped baton and swirled a fiery circle in the Main Foyer and on at least one of the small table-sized stages that dot Masonic. But when she and another dancer parted the revelers in the Fountain Ballroom, sometime after midnight, that’s when I really took notice. The routine was a spirited tug-of-war / pas de deux of sorts where the pair struggled to possess a flaming bauble. With contortions and gymnastic flair, the two gleefully contested, wrestled and writhed… and never even singed the awestruck crowd. This is the kind of unexpected wonderment I’ve come to expect from Theatre Bizarre.
Love the gloveElsa and I started the evening in the Dirty Devil’s Burlesque, since we know the room crowds up early. A patron could spend the entire evening watching these beauties and get a great introduction to the state of the burlesque art. Dahlia Fatale and Dangrrr Doll were remarkable for the fluid physicality of their acts but I was glad to finally see Lou Lou Roxy, a Las Vegas performer who has recently relocated to Detroit. I believe I could watch her work out of her gloves for quite a contented eternity.
We drifted and indulged and found ourselves in the first floor Ballroom early enough to secure a table for several of the signature performances. There are several traditions at Theatre Bizarre, set pieces repeated and revered to the point of becoming rituals. The Devil’s Tightrope is one routine that, while not precisely my taste, is a remarkable, must-see stunt. It features BOTH kinds of mischief, both clowns and devils. A rope is suspended between hooks sunk into the flesh of two strong men, lit on fire before a hapless clown is forced at knife-point to walk across that perilous line. Don’t try it at home.
One of Theatre Bizarre’s recurring cast is “The Doll,” whose joyous zeal really epitomizes the weird fun of the affair. We spotted her as usual all around the festivities, sometimes atop stilts and brandishing a massive hammer, sometimes just cuddling a doll. When she appeared onstage in “The Doll and the Devil,” I feared that her innocent joie de vivre would be besmirched by that compellingly androgynous faun who attempted to seduce her. Ha! I worried in vain. The Doll was triumphant and the Devil got his comeuppance in the end, quite literally.
“The Clown’s Surprise” featured two more of the Theatre Bizarre regulars, a lanky clown and a remarkably acrobatic devil girl. Both performers pop up all around the show, accosting customers and performing bits, and Elsa and I have thrilled to their talents, year after year, but it was fun to finally see an act where both could play off each other’s strengths.
Then there were the big name acts who deserve their notoriety; Ray Gunn, Roxi D’lite, Red Rum… It’s a privilege to say I’ve seen them perform.
There was ice cream and dancing, popcorn and short-attention span porn movies, in addition to other naughtiness best left unmentioned. Theatre Bizarre is an event ruled by serendipity, happy accidents of being in the right place at precisely the right time. These blessings more than compensate for the moments found trapped somewhere, surrounded by far too many people, pushing along in line for some attraction. Elsa and I have learned to take the long view, to relax and look around because at Theatre Bizarre, something amazing is happening just about everywhere.
The Theatre Bizarre Gala for 2015 is but a pleasant memory. Elsa and I know to arrive early to prolong the night. As usual, clowns, mimes and other shenanigans entertained us while we waited in line. This poor clown had an absurdly heavy suitcase apparently with a mind of its own.
Clowning around on the steps of Masonic, waiting for Theatre Bizarre Gala 2015Both kinds of entertainment: Clowns AND Mimes.The evening heats up with fire dancing contortionists.Alley-oop!No, no, NO! Forks go in your MOUTH!Don’t feed the Devil Girl… though it looks like she might just take a bite if you get too closeA contact juggler with his mesmerizing crystal balls
Undead bellhops prepare an elevator to Hell…or to the OdditoriumThe evening heats up with fire dancing contortionists.Even the undead bellhops were snapping photos
Two headsDavid J of Bauhaus performed memorable, Big Band version of “Bela Lugosi’s Dead”Can there really be too many photos of Roxi?Roxi Delite, onstage in all her luminous glory
Roxi Delite prepares to Ride the Goat.
I’m told each piece of candy corn is laced with LSD
The Doktor and I have acquired quite a shelf of memorabilia from Theatre Bizarre, and my most treasured item is a 3-D souvenir portrait we had done at the 2014 Gala. True, the Doktor may have been temporarily more excited by the Saunders Bumpy Cake and he strutted like a peacock when he (finally) won a Zombo doll at the Feats of Skill, but a couple weeks later, when we received this hand-sized statue, we both were able to recall the glories of that special evening all over again. Many thanks to the Great Fredini who brought his Scan-a-Rama rig all the way from Coney Island to capture these memories.
The statue itself is bright red and made from hard plastic, roughly 5 inches tall and perfectly captures the weird get-up that the Doktor and I assumed for the evening. Honestly the scan is quite remarkable. The Doktor and I are fans of 3-D printing and in fact have been scanned previously using various homebuilt rigs, but never in full regalia. Fredini’s statuette captured the nuances of our costume. It recalled for me the childhood glee of those coin-operated, wax-model machines that we popular in the 60’s. (The Henry Ford Museum has a half dozen working examples BTW.) Our statue is a personalized remembrance of that delightful evening.
The scanning process was a particularly interesting experience. The Doktor and I stood on a rotating platform that slowly moved while Fredini’s fabulous contraption scanned us. Sorry, no lasers, no tingling magnetic rays. We had carefully worked out a pose –the Doktor’s adoration and my bemused benediction– but found it rather a challenge to keep from laughing… and to stay still after partaking of the Gala’s open bar.
This is pure magic, of course, but not rocket science. A dedicated hobbyist could assemble similar equipment using off the shelf components. In fact, Fredini has even shared the plans for his rig publicly. The artistry comes in when it comes time to print the 3-D scan. Our printed statues are smooth, entirely lacking the jaggies of low-resolution, hobbyist-grade 3-D printers. The details are soft but expressive. (How did the Doktor convince me to wear a mask with such a big nose?) Fredini is using figures like these to populate a scale model of the entire Luna Park amusement park at its heyday.
At its core, Theatre Bizarre is a glorious expression of weird ingenuity, from its genesis as a renegade backyard amusement park to its full-flower at the Greatest Masquerade on Earth. It seemed appropriate on a couple levels that the Great Fredini of Coney Island fame was on hand at Theatre Bizarre 2014 to create 3-D portraits of attendees. Amusement parks were originally somewhat licentious excursions for young lovers to indulge in exotic fantasies and extravegant treats. Is there a better description of Theatre Bizarre? And what could be a more fantastic souvenir from that fabulous night than a 3-D statue of my lover and me?
Who knows what wonders will appear at this year’s Theatre Bizarre! We can hardly wait to find out.
It’s time to take down that ratty Sisters of Mercy poster, the one you taped to your dorm room wall, the one that’s followed you into this so-called adult life that you’re leading. I understand why you cling to this relic. It reminds you of when you were with-it, when you were relevant. I agree. You need better things to hang on your walls than the soul-less, mass market crap from Kmart. But face it, there’s not a lot left of the paycheck for home decorating. Let me tell you about 1xrun.com.
Every single day, 1xrun.com features a different hip, reasonably priced art print. For a few bucks more, they’ll frame it using archival materials and ship it to you so well packaged and cradled it’s almost like they are home delivering babies or something. The runs are limited editions, signed and numbered and the images are from some of the freshest contemporary artists. I have a whole wall full of pieces by John Dunivant, the crazy genius behind Theatre Bizarre and they’re all from 1xrun. Other folks of interest to DailyNightmare readers are Glen Barr, Mimi Yoon, Chet Zar, Sarah Joncas… seriously, lots of great images. From time to time, 1xrun.com also offers the original art associated with the print run for more serious collectors with deeper pockets. Subscribe to the mailing list at least to slap something interesting in your face on a daily basis. “The Twins” by John Dunivant from 1xrun.com
From time to time, 1xrun.com has “Archive Sales” where they sell the final few pieces from some of their recent runs. This is the gold mine, the last-train-to-Clarkesville chance for missed opportunity. For instace, I was able to pick up Dunivant’s “The Twins” from a run printed long before I was hip to 1xrun. If you can keep a secret, there’s another Archive Sale happening this weekend and when I just checked, one of Dunivant’s “Illusionist’s Ball” prints was available, that cool poster from the last Theatre Bizarre but printed on metal.
“The Illusionist’s Ball” by John Dunivant from 1xrun.com
You took an art history class, didn’t you? You have a taste for the better things, cooler things. 1xrun will hook you up.
The Leech Doktor and I agree that if October is the best month of the year, then Theatre Bizarre is the month’s pinnacle. This past weekend we indulged ourselves at both the Gala preview and The Illusionists’ Ball, leaving with many stories to tell. Thankfully, there is no single answer to the question, “What is Theatre Bizarre?” Allow me to offer you a review in three scenes. What I told my mother
Why, Theatre Bizarre is a beautiful costume party! People dress up in wonderful, elegant costumes, and then they spend the evening dancing away at Detroit’s Masonic Temple. There is every imaginable costume! Royalty, storybook characters, ghosts and ghouls, and vampires of course. The Doktor and I wore masks that he made, and he wore his tuxedo, and I wore a long black taffeta skirt. We talked with friends, and watched the shows, and danced ’til all hours. We slept like babies! Photo by Michael Smith What I told my best friend Why, Theatre Bizarre is an outrageous and exciting costume party event! People dress up in dream-like or nightmarish costumes, and then they spend the evening exploring the secret chambers at Detroit’s Masonic Temple. The costumes are incredible! Babydolls with gigantic heads, steampunk gentlemen, Leeloo from the 5th Element, ghosts and ghouls, and vampires of course. The Doktor and I wore original Commedia dell’arte masques to the Gala, and he wore his blue tuxedo, and I wore a silver striped corset and a black taffeta skirt. For the second night, we donned rather frightening skull masks, and I delighted in the double-takes of the other revelers! We visited with friends and strangers, and watched burlesque shows, and danced ’til all hours to live music including David J of Bauhaus singing “Bela Lugosi’s Dead.” We slept like rocks… after the Doktor satisfied his Roxi-inspired fantasies!
What I tell my therapist
Why, Theatre Bizarre is a playground, a dazzling and frightening vision, a clearing in the woods where the Bacchanal is celebrated– and I willingly succumb! In my safe disguises, I follow the costumed throng to explore the secret chambers at Detroit’s Masonic Temple. Baby dolls with bloated heads and tentacles, French aristocrats, naughty nuns, red horned devils, witches, ghosts and ghouls, full-body paint and a lack of clothing! I hid behind the original Comedia del’Arte mask, and from the safety of that anonymity, took in the event. For the second night, we donned frightening skull masks, and I delighted in scaring and leering at the other revelers! We curiously watched the burlesque dancers including Roxi DLite‘s final performance of Zombo’s Funeral/Resurrection and Hayley Jane, the suspension rigs, the rope work that balanced and manipulated an almost naked young woman above the floor, the BDSM play by Lady Pain and her Tortured Souls. And we danced in a haze of strobe lights and smoke. My dreams were haunted by naked women wearing huge oxen heads, ghouls waving their arms at me, monsters, murderers, and witches that I followed through dark hallways, wondering What does it all mean? And how long until I can go back again?
Today, Elsa and I scored a pair of tickets to Theatre Bizarre, the creepiest spectacle in the Motor City. This year’s theme is The Procession, and fittingly, the line was long but briskly moving in front of the Rust Belt Artist Market in Ferndale. While we waited, we traded costume ideas with other folks in line. Spoiler Alert: expect some crazy get-ups and wild shenanigans.
Once inside, the Theatre Bizarre had fully inhabited the new-ish central court area and had dolled the place up good with their hand-painted carnie signs and bits of weird. The first 200 tickets sold today and tomorrow are $55 then prices shoot up to the very reasonable $65. Readers of the DailyNightmare.com are HIGHLY ADVISED to procure tickets at any price since the experience is the epitome of classy, creepy Midwest fun.
Last Saturday evening, Elsa and I dolled ourselves up but good and trotted down to the 2012 offering of Theatre Bizarre called The Summoning. We return with a heart full of fond memories and a clawful of blurry photos. Let understatement suffice: The evening was everything I had hoped for.
The party started while we waited in line. My faith in the inherent creativity of humanity was rekindled as I surveyed the varied costumes as we shivered in the cold. A very serviceable Sir Graves Ghastly caught my eye, complete with the cackle and tagline “Happy Haunting.” I also spotted a Slestak from Land of the Lost, and one particularly brave lady portraying Leeloo from The Fifth Element wore only a handful of strategically placed bandages. There were several costumes based around wheelchairs and all of them were high quality, though my personal favorite was the guy who was a whole pirate ship. But the best costumes were glorious self expressions of uncategorizable ingenuity. One guy wore swirls of striped fabrics, pale body paint with hundreds of dots. Does it really matter what he was “supposed” to be?
Once inside, we milled around the entry way, taking in the animated Fiji Mermaid and thrilling to a diorama of previous extravaganzas when all of a sudden the Detroit Party Marching Band appeared in our midst to serenade us with deafening, butt-shakin’ grooves. The festivities were officially underway and this surprise performance primed us for a night of sudden wonders. The design geniuses of Theatre Bizarre did their crafty best to splice their weird DNA onto the already strange architecture of the massive Masonic Temple. Floor upon floor of wonders and oddities exploited the nooks and crannies of this grand edifice.
It’s easy enough to list the set areas and extoll their virtues: Here, a raucous dance floor, complete with fire dancers;
there, an “Odditorium” of off-beat sideshow performers, a room of suspensions and ritualized performance, another of spanking and naughtiness.
There, a “Sinema” showing silent horror flicks with strange subtitles and most importantly, handing out free popcorn.
Good, old fashioned burlesque dancers performed in one room, entering through a proscenium shaped like the devil’s mouth.
A game room tucked to one side had pinball machines and cleverly modified devices like this detail of a Career Prediction machine.
On our travels we discovered a sweet shop that served deliciously wacky flavors of ice cream — I had absinthe laced licorice and Elsa sampled the pumpkin and bourbon blend.
Way down in the basement, bands rocked the house to its foundations and way up on the top floor, a Ghost Train took riders on a perilous trek through a mist filled expanse.
The best advice came from the devil ahead of us in line for the Ghost Train: “Just keep walking and keep your eyes open.” Often, we would walk past and area and discover it had been transformed into a performance space. A fez topped vibraphone player popped up in one area and a swanky jazz combo appeared in another niche. I spotted several darkly made-up contortionists who crawled along the floor and furniture and leered like impudent lizards. I *think* they weren’t just guests.
Liquid refreshment was plentiful and reasonably priced. Merchandise was quirky and tasteful. Elsa and I danced ourselves limp and sweaty on the dance floor amid revelers literally half out age.
We crawled away while the party was still in full swing though part of me wanted to take up permanent residence. In short: Theatre Bizarre is one circus this horror snob would gladly run away to join. See you there, next year.
